Respect, Refrigerator Perry and Me

I’ve had a lot of people comment about the way I’ve handled this week’s onslaught of fat hatred.  I was actually thinking about that tonight as I  followed a link to one of the forums that generated the bullying, abusive comments and I read the following quote:

“I researched her and believe that she is very active and extremely accomplished both physically and otherwise,  but she doesn’t seem to understand that being fat cancels that all out.  If she is fat she will never have any credibility, and nobody will ever care what she says and that’s how it should be. She needs to get that being fat means she doesn’t matter.”

This is really more plain stupidity than I want to address directly, but here’s what popped into my mind:

I recently read that a study by the University of North Carolina showed 56% of NFL players are “obese”.  (Based on BMI which we know is a crap measurement but that’s what we use nowadays until we decide to abandon lazy medicine for the actual pursuit of health).

The average NFL Salary is almost a million dollars a year.

William “Refrigerator” Perry was an NFL player.  He stood 6’2 and weighed 382 pounds, his body mass index was 49.4.

I am a competitive dancer.  At 5’4 and 284 pounds my body mass index is 48.7.

The Fridge was flexible:

I am flexible:

He trained

I train

He had functional strength

I have functional strength

He was an admitted alcoholic who would sometimes drink 2 cases of beer a night and vodka by the gallon, and he paid no attention to healthy eating and nearly died because of it.  His behavior was rewarded:  He was revered as an athlete, paid millions of dollars, and made into an action figure.  Being fat certainly didn’t cancel out his accomplishments.

I practice Health at Every Size, eat reasonably, workout and dance very regularly, never started drinking and am in perfect health.

I got called a “Fucking Fatass” over 150 times in the last two days. Twenty three people said they wanted me to die, and one person said that they wanted to punch me over and over and watch me die.  Perfect strangers called me a “Fat Cunt”, “Fat Fuck”, “Stupid Fuck” and told me  “I hate everything about you.”

But I got off easier than the Fridge.  Everyone loved him and he apparently hated himself so much that he nearly killed himself through sheer neglect of his health.  Apparently there are people who hate me but I love myself, take care of myself, and enjoy perfect health.

The moral of this whole story for me is that I get to choose how I feel about myself and how I treat myself.  I am, in fact,  THE ONLY person in charge of this.  So, it follows that what other people think or say about me doesn’t affect how I feel about myself or how I treat myself unless I allow it to.

To be clear, I expect my decisions about my health to be respected and I think a really good place to start with that is by respecting the decisions of others. If you choose to hate yourself or your body because of how other people treat you, or if you choose to neglect your health because you want to rebel against society or you just don’t feel like it, or for whatever reason, you can absolutely do that.  It doesn’t hurt, disrespect, or negate anyone else’s choice and so I  respect your decision.

I’ve made my choice and once I sorted out how I will choose  to feel about myself and treat myself, the rest is about living openly and honestly and demanding and fighting for the basic human respect that I deserve and require.  More difficult than it sounds to be sure but but much easier, in my experience, if I start by respecting myself.

61 thoughts on “Respect, Refrigerator Perry and Me

  1. You are so amazing for being able to stay strong and positive in the face of so much hate from people who don’t even know you. I’m not sure hearing comments like that wouldn’t destroy me. You are an inspiration, and I adore your blog. I’m so glad these horrible people aren’t getting you down or at least stop you from writing.

  2. Don’t let these jackasses wear you down. After the first word of such posts or emails, hit the delete key reflexively. They do not deserve a reading.

    Be careful of what you expose your mind to.

  3. Its so good to read that you love & respect yourself, this is something that the majority of the population cannot truthfully say, the world is full of too much self hatred. I am pleased that I have found your blog and that people like you exist who are not afraid to share their feelings.
    Thankyou for sharing 🙂 K

  4. WOW WOW WOW…I hope you are staying strong. People are jerks, esp those you can hide behind a computer screen in their mother’s basement without a job. Stay strong! I know you are!

  5. I’m so sorry you’re being subjected to abuse by these schmucks. Let us hope that their minds will soon be opened; although of course, first they’d have to acquire a mind.

    I just wanted to express my gratitude to you for doing what you do and for your amazing blog posts. I have always wanted to learn to dance but being over 400lbs and rather shy, I never had the courage. Since I started reading your blog, I booked a course of dance lessons, and have been to the first three. I’m going to the next one tonight, and I’m looking forward to it. I doubt I will ever be an athlete like yourself, but dance is really incredibly enjoyable.

    Thank you very much for inspiring me.

    1. Beautifully said. Enjoy the dance!

      Ragen, you are amazing and I’m in awe of your strength!

      Mary-Ellin

  6. Oh i’m sure the same idgits that are hating on you hate ‘refrigerator’ perry as well. cuz otherwise they’d be hypocrites. ~.^ ne?

    On another note, lately in my classes (nutrition student) i have been hearing about IGF-1 (insulin-like growth factor). IGF-1 has been shown to promote cell growth and inflammation, leading to diabetes, CHD, and different cancers. The idea is that adipose tissue itself produces more of this substance and other inflammatory cytokines. I was wondering if you knew anything about this; i’ll have to look more into it anyway.

    For the most part i’d argue though is that a healthful diet (and exercise) with lots of fruits and vegetables goes a long way in counteracting this effect, even without weight loss. I’ve seen many times statistics that show weight loss is near impossible (it’ll come back, yo!), so a good diet/behaviors is really all one can do.

    as you’ve said before, people assume because they themselves can do something (i.e. lose weight), everyone else is morally obligated to do the same.
    or else they simply think it’s easy to not be fat–which is a foul egocentricity.

  7. You are an inspiration to me and I am sure many many people. Keep up your wonderful work……It is a shame that our society is so full of spiritless people. It is my believe people who spend their energy making fun of people or preaching hate lack a spiritual soul. These people are so full of negativity, they lack tolerance and understanding…..I am grateful for your positive attitude toward life. It is catchy. I enjoy your love of dance. Thank you for being you and sharing it with us.

  8. Ragen, this is why I LOVE YOU.

    I’ve been subjected to the onslaught of internet troll hatred before and I know how much it hurts and infuriates. I can’t understand the hate and fear that lives in some people’s minds — but you, as always, are responding with intelligence, humor and grace. Stay strong — there are SO many of us who support you and everything you are doing.

  9. I think there’s a huge gender component to the situation. These body building forums are dominated by heterosexual men who probably mostly only value women for their sexual/aesthetic value and aren’t used to “taking women seriously” (i.e. treating them like humans). When men are confronted by you, they get scared and insecure because not only are you asking serious and direct questions about their body/health logic but you’re also more subtly casting doubt how they value women (because you have a body that they aren’t supposed to find attractive) and the gender hierarchy in general (because a woman is seriously questioning the values of men, whether directly or indirectly).

    If a man has some sort of “redeeming quality”, he’s more likely to be taken seriously regardless of his size; the same isn’t true for a woman because she has to work extra hard to be taken seriously regardless of whether she’s perceived as fat or thin.

  10. Wonderful comparison between you and Refrigerator Perry! I wonder if his fat is acceptable because he is a man? Whereas you are a woman…and a dancer…so you must be slim and willowy? Just thoughts…

    xo Susie

  11. If you replace the word ‘fat’ with the word ‘black’ (or ‘gay’ or ‘woman’ or whatever) from the forum above, most everyone would agree a comment like that would be completely unacceptable because it is racist (or sexist or homophobic) but somehow it’s magically okay to negate someone’s existence because of their body. Because it’s okay to hate as long as it’s the RIGHT kind of hate!

    Sorry you are having to hear such horrible remarks from these sad people. From one dancer to another, keep it up!! ; )

  12. You just can’t win with these people can you? Their mantra is Fat people are fat because they eat crap and don’t exercise. So you eat healthfully and exercise- probably more than they do. And then it’s that none of that matters? more so, if they think that exercise and healthy eating will automatically make you think (because being lazy and gluttonous makes you fat to begin with right?) then what kind of awful ‘logic’ must they employ when they’re confronted with an active fat person who eats healthfully? and how on earth would they even expect you to become thin (since being fat means you don’t matter apparently) when their magic bullet of diet and exercise didn’t work? It’s ridiculous! How on earth can they even stand the contradiction?

  13. The clear issue is not your weight, but your weight and being a woman. If you were a man, there would be high-fives all around. Unfortunately, mothers often fail in raising their sons to be respectful and decent human beings. These may be women who look just like you but do not have the strength or conviction to say “stop it.”
    My condolences for the nastiness and outright ignorance you have faced for having an opinion, one saving grace is that even the ignorant can actually read your articles even if they can not properly articulate their ideas civilly. I have had the privilege to be included in the interactions of teenagers over the years being the “hang-out” house. I am of abundant size and a belly dancer/teacher.When the conversations come to health, beauty, relationships I often hear the comment that they would rather have a healthy partner with curves than a sickly one that feels like a bicycle. These are the young men who know that body issues like anorexia are not attractive. Education and strong women….two very scary aspects for men (and women) with no self esteem.

  14. Well said. The way you live your life is inspiring. People can be assholes – try not to lose sleep over it. Thank you for writing about everything that you do.

  15. The flaws people see in others is a direct response to the harsh judgement they make upon themselves whether they realize it or not. Many get on line and make crude inflammatory comments just to push a button. They had behind a computer moniter to deal out the justice they should only be directing at themselves. That doesn’t mean THEY are overweight. It means regardless of their size the have a warped perception of what God’s creations should be. If you can’t see beuaty in your brothers and sisters – how will you ever see it in the mirror?
    Bless them for where they are in the journey. They have a long way to go.

  16. I’m just wondering what the logic is. You’re very accomplished, but you’re fat therefore? Fat is the opposite of accomplishment? Eh?

    If zie is simply arguing that people won’t listen to you or believe your accomplishments, then that makes more sense – but that’s also their problem, not yours isn’t it? Why is it your responsibility to present yourself to them in ways that are comfortable to them rather than to you?

    (Quoting Lois McMaster-Bujold) “Never believe in a meritocracy where nobody is funny looking.” Competitive dance is a venue where almost nobody is allowed to be funny looking, or fat, or anything else, and somehow we’ve come to believe that dancing ability is somehow correlated with the proper body type and look. You’re proof that that’s nonsense, and a lot of people don’t like hearing that.

  17. “She needs to get that being fat means she doesn’t matter.”

    Funny, if you didn’t matter, would anybody bother to post violent death threats to you? If you really didn’t matter, why would that poster even feel the need to respond to your post? It seems to me that you matter very very much, so much that you are a threat to these people who so desparately want to hold on to their false elitist identities as non-fat people. The truth is, if you didn’t matter, you’d never hear a peep from total strangers. Nevermind that you matter to all the people who come racing to your blog every day (like me). For all the wonderful things that the internet has brought us (booking vacations! shopping online! Google Earth!) it is also this amazing repository for stupidity like the kind you encountered this week. You are a total inspiration Ragen.

  18. I think you are beautiful, inspirational and a terrific writer.

    People can be hateful, bigoted weenuses. Reading ANY comments on a story of ANY sort that doesn’t demonize fat can be a soul-crushing experience.

    Ignore ’em and dance on.

  19. Love love love this follow-up. The NFL comparison is priceless. I also wonder how much less abuse you would take if you were male…. But that may be for another post! 🙂

  20. The people who left you those horrid comments are obviously harboring some serious self-hatred and anger. Thank you for being a positive and outspoken person.

  21. Rock on, sister! You do matter, and their hateful words actually prove that. If you didn’t then they wouldn’t even bother. Why bother with someone who doesn’t matter. Doctor Who time! From Doctor Who A Christmas Carol:
    “Who is this?”
    “Nobody important.”
    “Nobody important? Blimey, that’s amazing. You know that in nine hundred years of time and space and I’ve never met anybody who wasn’t important before.”

    Something that amazes me about myself, because let’s face it, this is my problem, is that I seem to do the opposite of what these people like to do. I have a tendency to find the good in just about all people, even when they don’t deserve it, but often have trouble finding it in myself. Please don’t mistake this as digging for compliments, or that I don’t feel that I am a person worthy of respect and love. I know I am, and I am working on demanding that respect from the people who surround me, but I’ll be damned sometimes if I can demand the same level of respect from myself. It’s not as if I stand in front of the mirror and berate myself, but I also don’t stand in front of the mirror and raise myself up either. However, the more I realize that I am not flawed simply because I have extra adipose, the more I realize that the person I am deserves respect. I know that I could sit and list here all the things I adore about you, and if I knew the other commenters (one of which commented because I linked your blog on FB, which makes me very happy) I could do the same for them.

    The point of all of this is that I am so glad I am out of an environment that I am forced to be surrounded by simple minded people. I get to choose who I spend my time with now. I get to choose to be around people who, while they may not always agree with me, they know how to respect my choices and how I live my life. I get to surround myself with people who love and like WHO I am and what is in my head, more than they care about if I carry extra weight.

    The journey of a thousand miles starts with a single step. I am taking that step in my journey towards self love (and not in a narcissistic way), and I am so very thankful every day that I have people that are taking those steps with me. And if we continue to step together, we can make an impact in the world.

  22. I’m appalled at the sheer quantity of hatred shown towards you when you should be applauded and supported for being happy and healthy.

    Humans are cruel by nature. Peace to you. You are beautiful. 🙂

  23. Lady, where have you been all my life?
    A poet I know named Kathy Barron hipped me to your blog. It is amazing and inspiring. Thank you!

    I used to know a dude who constantly said “Yeah, but all things being equal, it’s better to be thin.” At the time, I couldn’t articulate why that pissed me off so much–except that “all things” are never actually “equal.” After reading some of your posts on junk science, it’s becoming very clear. There really is a whole industry devoted to making money through shaming and blaming. Fat people, poor people, gay people; it’s a lot of the same prejudice based on no real knowledge of people and their behaviors.

  24. Hi Ragen,
    I was pointed to your blog a couple of days ago, and I’ve been lurking ever since, so I thought it was time to say hi!
    “…She needs to get that being fat means she doesn’t matter.”
    This comment just amazed me. Not “her opinions don’t matter”. Not “her lifestyle doesn’t matter”. She doesn’t matter.
    This kind of thinking makes my heart hurt.
    I just wonder what kind of satisfaction these people get from directing this kind of hate. I mean, it’s not even a case of that they are trying to show you “the error of your ways” or to convince you that “your reasoning is faulty”. They are just spewing hate because you dare to have an opinion on a lifestyle that is different to theirs, and not only that, you are thriving in that lifestyle, and unapologetic.
    As a big girl, and a dancer, and (gasp! even worse!) someone who is enabling fat women to not just exercise but to look good while doing it (and believe me, I’ve had some doozies of emails sent to me about it) I just want to say to you – Rock On, Ragen. You are amazing.

  25. Ragen, you are such a badass. You win the internet.

    Also, I hope that someday I can have as much confidence, self-love, and general awesomeness as you.

  26. Love, love, LOVE this post! How beautifully you wrapped things up, Ragen! An elegant comparison indeed that exposes some of the inconsistency and hypocrisy of fat hate. When I read the line, “she needs to get that being fat means she doesn’t matter,” at first I was furious at this person’s gall to claim that bodyfat invalidates your human worth. Then I had to laugh, because that dumb assertion collapses in this face of your blog. Anyone who actually looks at your site and reads the commments can see how you are loved by family, friends, and fans alike. Ever counted up how many people write in to say how you’ve had a positive impact in their lives? I bet that troll has not had one iota of the positive impact you’ve had. Not that your worth or anyone else’s is defined by other people, But there are obviously a lot of people out there who would loudly disagree with the opinion that you don’t matter.

    Yours is my favorite blog, btw. Cheers! 😉

    “When everyone loves you, you’re dead.” -Mae West

    1. I adore the Mae West quote, I’d not heard it before. Thank you for the support, it is very appreciated and it made my day that I’m your favorite blog.

      Thanks!

      ~Ragen

  27. Historical note, for what it’s worth, the Refrigerator had a fan club of a group of cheerleaders, many of whom were fat, and they called themselves the “Refrigerettes.” They were so happy that a man his size was valued.

  28. This post and the one preceding it were some of the best work I’ve seen on this blog. I don’t comment frequently, but you should know I’ve been reading regularly for a long time now, and your anger-inspired tirade was both eloquent and moving.

    However, I need to get this off my chest:

    Ragen, I know it’s important to you that your activism at least partially pays back its time investment, but you NEED to find a different advertising solution. It’s probably because you name-check the lap band so often, but Google has shown us nothing but diet and lap-band ads on this blog for a long time. This means that you are inadvertently funding the very institutions that constantly undermine fat acceptance at every turn. Your blog is a revenue source for the same companies you spend so much effort demonizing. In short, until you find a method of ad delivery that doesn’t serve us the products that you want people to shun, then every post you make will have these ads, quietly undermining the integrity of your entire site.

    1. Hi there!

      Thanks so much, I’m really glad that you liked the blogs. As far as the ads go, I do not make any money off of them at all. I specifically developed on the wordpress.com platform so that I would not have to monetize the blog. The downside of that is that wordpress runs Google Ads on my blog and they have become almost all diet driven as you noticed.. I have contacted WordPress to see if there is anything that can be done and I am looking into options but it is difficult to switch to another platform and I lose my linkbacks and such. For now I’m really sorry for the dissonance.

      Thanks Jon,

      ~Ragen

      1. Actually, I smile to see those ads, because those companies are LOSING money on your site! Seriously, how many of your readers do you think are clicking those links? Your whole sire is contrary to what they are selling so you’re doing your little part to cut off their greed. 😉

      2. That’s so bizarre. I ran a Blogger blog for a while (y’know, the one that’s OWNED by Google), and they didn’t force me to use Google Ads. It seems really sketchy that WordPress forces you to have the ads and doesn’t let you keep the money.

        Oh well. I’ve never been fond of WP, but you’ve got infrastructure set up now and it’s probably not worth losing all that.

        Probably.

      3. On the other hand, as of today I don’t see any ads on here anymore. Did you do something, Ragen, or is the blog reacting to my ludicrously tight network security?

        1. I found out that you can buy the right to not have ads and I did it. When I looked into it before I was told that they didn’t have this option, and that all I could do was tell people to get a wordpress.com account because those who are logged in don’t see ads. Now there will be no more ads for anyone. Yay! Thanks for the push.

          ~Ragen

  29. I’ve spent the day sick on the couch. I don’t know how people can watch daytime tv all day and not have a negative self image. On the Today show they talked about how old is too old to wear certain items like stilletos and mini skirts…although they never said it outright, they seemed to imply as long as you were extremely thin and you’re comfortable there isn’t an age limit. Later on Rachel they had the gal who was losing weight for her prom…she broke her leg. I felt like going out and buying a mini skirt and stilletos (which I’ve never worn) and just work them. I was screaming at the tv telling the kid that she was living, hiking, and the important thing was to live passionately and not worry about the weight–that she isn’t a failure.
    And yet…clearly unless we buy into their belief that we need to hate ourselves, submit to the diet culture– we’re viewed negatively. Well…it doesn’t matter what they think. They’re not the ones living in our skin and they can’t control our perceptions of ourselve if we won’t let them. Thanks, Ragen:)

  30. I have been reading this site for a little over a year now and I absolutely love it. You and this site are an inspiration to me. I would also really like to thank you for all honest research you’re putting out there. You’re one of the few people who actually bothers to put the truth out there and it keeps me sane and helps me to love myself.

    I say down with the hateful jerks. I received some fat and general hatred too over a year ago. These people suck, are liars and need to get over themselves.

    I just wanted to show my appreciation for what you do and have done, and help cancel out the hatred you have received. I hope you’ll never stop.

  31. People who feel the need to comment on other people’s lives by attempting to harm them with their words or actions, do so because they are exceedingly insecure about their own bodies, their own minds, and their own value. I’d feel sorry for them but they are adults and should know better.

  32. You matter. You matter. You matter. They’re the ones who don’t matter, and they know it. The only way they can leave a mark on the world is leaving hateful comments they can revisit time and time again, much like serial murderers who re-visit their victims.

    This is their contribution to society. You are worth so much more because you understand the universal truth of compassion, love and tolerance, towards yourself and the world around you.

    I won’t tell you to turn a blind eye to these hater- you always want to keep your enemies in plain sight. I love that you prefer to stand and fight, as you damned well should. This entire episode will have made you stronger, and you have your new enemies to thank for it.

    I would caution you, though, to view them with as much compassion as you can. If you’re going to truly walk away from this, you have to forgive and let it go.

    You won’t have to fight for compassion, empathy and respect – not if you align yourself with those who already respect you, who understand love for self and everyone else. I wish you the best of everything – health, happiness and great dance routines.

    I think your site is fabulous and I’ll be back again and again.

  33. Well put!…I have just found your blog and admire your spirit immensely. I am also a dancer and run Inner Beauty dance workshops for women. I will definitely introduce them to your blog as an inspiration.

    As a dancer you know how to move with fluidity and grace…I believe this resonates through all aspects of being, not just the physical… the Dance of the Soul to the rhythm of life, emotion given form, your inner world expressed creatively…I see your beauty.

    Those hateful messages just prove you are shining brightly with truth and joy, bright enough to attract dark comments trying to pull you down into their hate-filled gloom and horror.

    Yet I read the messages posted here and see that you inspire much gratitude, respect and love in others…this is what is important.

  34. You’ve made a perfectly beautiful and poignant statement. I will never truly “understand” why people chose to be so hateful. Clearly, they feel threatened by something… probably their own lack of self-worth. Obviously you’re well equipped to deal with that aspect of people, but I think that other, younger minds will find this very inspirational. It can be a great help to see other strong women (and men) who have learned to love themselves and ignore the nescience of that certain kind of person who attacks others to feel better about themselves (which I’m sure can’t actually WORK.) I will be spreading this as far and wide as I am able, and I hope others will do the same.

  35. I have so much love for you right now Ragen! The fact that you are giving a rational adult response instead of flaming/meltdown/whatever is awesome. Haters, as they say, are gonna hate. Just remember that there are an awful lot of people on your side – people who you have educated about HAES though this site (me included).

  36. Amid the torrent of hate, I’d like to register my support for what you do and who you are. Your presence on the web, in my inbox, and in the world inspires me and reinforces what I know is real, true, and actually healthy. *Thank you.*

  37. I admire your plunky determination. Please don’t listen to negative short sighted people. They are going nowhere fast.

    In our society people have the right to be wrong and the right to turn off their brains. It is unfortunate that so many chose to do both. Thanks for your insightful post! It brings a breath of fresh air into a stale room.

  38. Hi Ragen,

    I’m new to your blog, but I had to comment and add my voice to the lovefest. You are amazing. You are a light in the darkness. I’m so glad I found you.

    ~Meg

  39. I just found your blog today through a friend’s link. I’m sorry to hear about the awful comments you got, but I hope you know there are waaaay more people who support and enjoy your blog.
    Not sure if anyone has said this yet, but perhaps the people who left the comments were very young. It just sounds like the kind of cruel, unthinking thing a very young child might say without understanding the effects of their words.
    Of course, it could be that the posters just have the social intelligence of a five year old 😉
    Keep up the great work and thank you for inspiring so many people!

  40. Just wanted to add some more Ragen-love to the comments section. Thank you for putting up with so much and doing it so admirably, with so much class and respect for yourself and others. You never stoop–I so admire your composure and (gots to say it again) class.

  41. You are incredible. I am in awe of this post. The fact that perfect strangers feel they can/should treat you that way makes me feel so much anger and disappointment. I’d like to see any of them do the things you do in your photos!

    I wonder if any of this hypocrisy has to do with the fact that you are a woman? Perhaps it is ok for a man like the Fridge because he is a man? I don’t know if i believe that, just a thought.

  42. Ragen,

    I love reading your blog. You are a voice of reason among all the nonsense that is the web.

    Trolls are playground bullies, resorting to name calling when they have nothing valid to say. Ignore them as best you can. I hope that you instead hear the voices of those of us who think you matter and value what you say.

    Thank you!

  43. Hey.

    First off, I got here from that forum, but please read on. It’s just that I kind of like it there -there is a bunch of nice health content and friendly advice if you can waddle through the bullshit (I’m not trying to imply you need any advice, I meant regular guys like me, not actual athletes), so I didn’t want you to think that assholes are all there is.

    I actually agree with a lot of your blog (I just spent a few hours reading a little). I’ve read a lot of those “Fat Acceptance” content, and I personally think is FUCKING WONDERFUL that the emphasis here is on health.

    And you might find amusing to know that some of those guys’ “role models” are actually fat guys (and I don’t mean big bearlike Fridge Perry fat guys, I mean short, round-bellied I-can-lift-a-thousand-pounds fat guys, like http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qBRG4RkE51Q).

    I don’t know, I’m not sure if I’m making any sense, but I felt like I had to write something.

    f.-

    1. Hi,

      Thanks for your comment, I really do appreciate it. I understand that not everyone agrees with me but it’s hard for me to fathom how that justifies telling me that they want me to die, calling me names etc. I have a lot of friends who are seriously lifters (some of whom look almost exactly like the dude in the video) and while some agree with my Health at Every Size approach and some don’t, they all respect my physical ability and my right to choose my own path to health (in no small part probably because they take a ton of crap from people telling them that power lifting is really dangerous, hurts their joints blah blah blah.) It just doesn’t seem like it would be that difficult for these people to respectfully disagree with me. Seriously, thanks for the comment, I appreciate it and good luck with your fitness goals.

      ~Ragen

    1. Thanks! It’s actually not mine though (oh how I would love to have a Reformer in my home!) – it’s the Mindful Body Center in Austin, Texas. I adore their set-up and their philosophy.

      ~Ragen

  44. Wow, thanks for posting this. I am a swimmer but I don’t have the perfect “swimmer’s body” – I am not ultra thin with super lean muscles – and because of that I take a lot of crap even though I was one of the fastest swimmers on the team (had to quit because I wouldn’t handle the comments from the other swimmers). I hated the condescending looks I get from other coaches when I’m placed in the middle lanes, and then the completely shocked look I get after winning a race, as if a girl who was bigger couldn’t ever be fast or athletic. Even my doctor, after telling me I have perfect blood pressure, a slow athletic heartbeat, an above average amount of muscle mass, and after hearing that I work out 60+ minutes a day and eat healthily, nervously told me to “watch out” because I was 10 pounds overweight.

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