Ariana Grande gave us a great example of just how ridiculous the “war on obesity” can become:
First, she went with her boyfriend to get some donuts:
For reasons passing understanding, she decided to lick some of the donuts that were on display on the counter, not tell anyone, and then buy other non-licked donuts.
She was caught on tape licking the donuts while making disparaging remarks about people from the US.
So she was forced to make an apology:
I am EXTREMELY proud to be an American and I’ve always made it clear that I love my country. What I said in a private moment with my friend, who was buying the donuts, was taken out of context and I am sorry for not using more discretion with my choice of words.
First of all, what difference does it make who was buying the donuts? Whatever. This would probably have been ok, but she couldn’t stop herself there:
As an advocate for healthy eating, food is very important to me and I sometimes get upset by how freely we as Americans eat and consume things without giving any thought to the consequences that it has on our health and society as a whole.
The fuck? Lady, you licked donuts on a donut shop counter, then you bought different donuts, leaving the donuts you licked behind. I can’t think of anyone whose thoughts about food and health are less relevant to this discussion in this moment. But she couldn’t stop there either:
The fact that the United States has the highest child obesity rate in the world frustrates me. We need to do more to educate ourselves and our children about the dangers of overeating and the poison we put in our bodies.
The actual fuck? I have to wonder if she arrived at this on her own or if some adviser was like “blame fat people, no…wait, blame fat kids that will totally work!” Like fat kids don’t face enough bullying, now we’re to believe that their mere existence has lead poor frustrated Ariana to lick donuts on a shop counter, then buy other donuts and eat them, as a way to educate about healthy foods (which, I would think, should include access to foods that haven’t been licked by a stranger.)
But wait, there’s more. In a second apology video called “sorry babes” she said:
“I kind of missed my opportunity to actually sincerely apologize and express how I was feeling because I was too busy preaching about my feelings with the food industry, which is not, like, relative,”
No, it’s not, like, relative. Hell, it’s not even relevant. How about instead of “Sorry but OMGDEATHFATZARECOMINGFORUS OMGFATKIDS!” just saying “I’m sorry that I licked donuts that were on a counter, and didn’t admit it until I was caught on tape and those donuts had been sold to other people. Wow, I am really a massive fuck up.”
This is the world that the “War on Obesity” has wrought, where “But fat people!” is accepted as a reason/excuse for everything from the suspension of scientific method/all logical thought, to practicing experimental medicine on kids, to calling for the eradication of fat people, to a pop star licking donuts. Fat people are not political punching bags, we are not yours for the metaphoring, we’re not a convenient way to distract from your donut licking behavior. Fat people are, in fact, people. We deserve to be treated with basic human dignity and we have the rights to life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. So if you want to lick some donuts, you’re on your own – leave fat people out of it.
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