I got a Facebook message from a blog reader who gave me permission to share this anonymously:
My mom passed away today after a long fight with cancer. She was dieting literally right up to the end, still putting things off until she was thin. It made me think about how my life could have been if I hadn’t found blogs like yours. I’d love for you to share this with your readers so that maybe my mom’s passing can help someone.
I’ve completely been there. I wasted years of my life with one simple thought:
“I need to concentrate on losing weight right now. I’ll [do things I want to do] when I reach my goal weight.”
Days, weeks, and months and years, that I will never get back, tracking every bit of food, calculating points, eating nasty pre-packaged food, giving up sugar, wheat, dairy, meat, drinking weight loss shakes, no popcorn at the movies, no cake on my birthday, punishing my body at the gym.
Believing that everyone who tries hard enough becomes thin, that thin was something that it was important to be, and that being thin is the golden ticket to everything, believing in magical weight loss thinking – that I was just x pounds from everything I could ever want. Believing that I should sacrifice my current life for my future thin self.
Looking back, I could easily have ended up like my reader’s Mom, still trying to lose weight on my deathbed – I’m not criticizing her mom – she made decisions for her and I have no idea how she felt about her life. For me, though, it’s scary and sad to think of the life I would have had if I hadn’t made the decision to stop dieting and starting living.
So, of course, I’m not trying to tell anyone how to live. I’m just suggesting that it might be worth thinking about – whatever you’re dreaming of doing when you’ve lost x pounds, or when you’re thin, what if you just did it now?
[EDIT: I somehow managed to delete this final paragraph before this was published, added back in now.] Now, this decision won’t change the fact that because of any number of injustices many things that we would like to do are not accessible to us, and I’m not saying for a minute that the decision negates those, makes them somehow our fault, or makes them not worth fighting. All I’m saying is that, if there are things we want to do and the only thing that stands between us and them is our belief that we should wait to do them until we are thin, we have the option to do those things right now.
Like this blog? Here’s more cool stuff:
Become a Member For ten bucks a month you can support size diversity activism, help keep the blog ad free, and get deals from size positive businesses as a thank you. Click here for details
Buy the book: Fat: The Owner’s Manual The E-Book is Name Your Own Price! Click here for details
Book Me! I’d love to speak to your organization. You can get more information on topics, previous engagements and reviews here or just e-mail me at ragen at danceswithfat dot org!
Dance Classes: Buy the Dance Class DVDs or download individual classes – Every Body Dance Now! Click here for details
I’m training for an IRONMAN! You can follow my journey at www.IronFat.com
A movie about my time as a dancer is in active development (casting, finding investors etc.). Follow the progress on Facebook!