Just a Quick Reminder

enoughIf you are celebrating holidays in the next couple months then I wish you a season of celebration full of awesomeness and devoid of food policing and unwanted drama.  Just in case that’s not how it works out for you, I offer you some quick reminders:

What you eat, what you weigh, and the prioritization and path to health that you have chosen are nobody else’s damn business unless you want them to be their business. Period.

You are allowed to do whatever you choose to get through difficult situations. You can educate, ignore, start screaming, leave, get along quietly, or something else.  All of these are valid choices.

People who police other people’s food choices and bodies are messed up.  You are fine.  If you want more tips on dealing with the food police and holiday drama, check out my column in Ms. Fit Magazine:   http://msfitmag.com/do-you-need-to-eat-that/  If you find yourself needing support you are welcome to e-mail me at ragen at danceswithfat dot org and I’ll help however I can.

PS:  I’ll be in Seattle for the marathon on Sunday. All wishes of luck, good vibes, and no blisters energy are very welcome!  A reader has started a finish line team on Sunday evening, and we are doing a meet-up at a restaurant on Tuesday night.  If you want details, e-mail me at ragen at danceswithfat dot org

Like my blog?  Looking for some holiday support or gifts?  Here’s more of my stuff!

The Book:  Fat:  The Owner’s Manual  The E-Book is Name Your Own Price! Click here for details

Dance Classes:  Buy the Dance Class DVDs or download individual classes – Every Body Dance Now! Click here for details 

Become a member: For just ten bucks a month you can keep this blog ad-free, support the activism work I do, and get deals from cool businesses Click here for details

Interviews with Amazing Activists!!  Help Activists tell our movement’s history in their own words.  Support In Our Own Words:  A Fat Activist History Project!

If my selling things on the blog makes you uncomfortable, you might want to check out this post.  Thanks for reading! ~Ragen

13 thoughts on “Just a Quick Reminder

  1. Thank you so much for this post. Reading this was just what I needed. My mother is policing everything that goes into her mouth-out loud. She also helpfully brought along a “health” book and is reading excerpts to us as we socialize. All of this is done so SHE can be “healthy” and she isn’t criticizing what I eat, but it is still so hard to be around someone with such disordered thinking.

    1. My 84 yr old mom with Alzheimer’s disease cannot stop making comments about her weight and what she/we are eating. Gods help me, but I want to have something more worthwhile than that to obsess about when I am there (IF)! I would welcome probing about why I am not married better than this! ❤

  2. Thank you, Regan. I’m about to spend the better part of three days in a dieter’s household where body shame is a regular feature of the humor, and I need the reminder that I can do it however seems best at the time. I love my friend dearly, but absolutely cannot convince her that conversation about weight loss is not something I handle well just now… or, you know, pretty much ever.

    Then again, I’m hoping to distract her with plenty of Alan Rickman. That often does the trick.

    Here’s to a fun-filled, blister-free marathon! I only wish I could be in Seattle cheering you on and joining you for the meet up. Know that I am there in spirit.

  3. Thanks again, Regan. As usual you have covered my back for the holidays and I am grateful. Since I tend to celebrate with other fat women, I don’t get much direct criticism, but the indirect can get painful since there is not an easy way to confront it. You are on my “thankful for” list. Survive the Holiday Season and good luck on your marathon! I guess ‘break a leg’ is inappropriate, hmm? Love you, Camcat

  4. Best of luck in the marathon, Ragen! May you remain blister-free throughout and have a wonderful meet-up with everyone at the end. Happy Thanksgiving to you.

  5. I don’t spend holidays with family anymore, preferring to spend them alone with my cat. Oddly enough, though, fat-shaming was never an issue with them. My family knew enough buttons to push without even getting close to the fat one.

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