Not Tiny, Not Working On It, and Not Putting Up With This

WTFA couple of days ago I got a lovely massage.  After two non-stop cross country flights, two 3- hour bus rides, and doing my workouts in the fricken freezing cold of New Hampshire, it was very welcome.  And it added to the rage I would have felt anyway when several readers let me know about a woman who had just finished a half-marathon was denied a massage because, at 250 pounds, she was “too fat” for the tables.  According to its website, at Natural Healing Center in Aurora, Colorado, the practitioners “are hand selected because of their training and ability, as well as their extensive experience and an innate gift as healers”  Innate gift here having the meaning of ability to fat shame.

They go on to explain that  “Healing is truly a “we” event. We build strong relationships with each patient so they have a partner in healing.”  Unless you’re fat.  Then you can you fuck right off.

My three hundred pound ass has had about a billion massages and never once was my weight a concern so I felt a bit confused when I read that Penny Wells, the center owner, claimed that a 165 pound man recently broke a table.  According to, the average American man weighs 191 pounds so it sounds like Penny needs to stop buying her massage tables a the 99 cent store.

What was even more upsetting to me was that, in the reports I saw, the lead quote was the woman saying “‘I mean I’m not tiny, I know that, but I’m working on it.”  Of course she is allowed to feel this way and do whatever she wants with her body.  I just want it made clear that  but it still it’s not just people who are trying to lose weight who deserves a shame-free massage. The truth is that everyone, of every size, deserves shame-free health and wellness care from a healing center where the uniforms aren’t “no fat chicks” t-shirts.

If you’d like to tell The Natural Healing Center what you think about this, you can shoot use this form to shoot them an e-mail.

Then I got a bunch of reader e-mails about “Dear Prudence,” Slate’s advice column, where a woman wrote in because she is concerned that someone else’s child is eating too much.  Of course, being prudent, Prudence told her that if she is looking for her beeswax, she won’t find it on someone else’s kid’s plate.  Just kidding!  She made a video where she illustrated the little girl as, I’m not kidding or hyperbolizing in any way, having a pig face.  I’m not linking or including the picture – you’ll have to google if you want to see this one.

Those of us who are mere mortals might suggest that, even if it was appropriate to food police other people’s kids – which it’s not – her snapshot view of this girl and her eating habits do not give this woman the information that she needs to make any kind of determination.  Luckily for Prudence, she’s a psychic who can tell the future so she let’s us know:

“Unfortunately, what’s going to be going on inside this little girl eventually is going to be broken down joints, a failing pancreas and clogged arteries.”

Wow, that’s specific. While you’re at it Prudie – I can call you Prudie, right? –  I could use next week’s lottery numbers.

But, Prudie says, don’t just keep your food shaming to yourself and an advice columnist, you’ve seen her eat two meals so go ahead and give her an eating disorder diagnosis and call the authorities (anonymously of course, since being a tremendous coward makes it easier to be all judge-y)

“And given that the parents seem committed to super-sizing her, I think it would be fair for you to contact this girl’s pediatrician. You can send an anonymous letter, and describe the compulsive eating. It might be helpful for an adult with authority to intervene.

Hell, why not just kidnap the girl and keep her in the basement on a diet of water and celery sticks – OMGDEATHFATZ ARE COMING FOR HER THE MOST HORRIFIC BEHAVIOR IS JUSTIFIED!!!!!!  Or, you know, not.

This is 100% not okay.  It is terrible advice, and I think it probably says more about Prudie’s own issues with food and weight than it says about how to deal with other people’s kid’s eating habits.

If you’d like to share any thoughts on this, you can contact Sarah Trankle at 212 445 5330 or

I’ll end today’s news trifecta with a little bit of win:

Julia Louis-Dreyfus chose to star in a commercial in which she first incorrectly guesses that a co-worker is pregnant and, when corrected, says ” “I would like to apologize to Betty for thinking that she was pregnant. Obviously she hasn’t dated anyone in forever!”

I have good news but I’ll give you a second to get over any pure rage you’re feeling at the idea that after mistaking a fat woman as pregnant the solution is to shame her by indicating the nobody would ever date her.

Good news:  the commercial was pulled from Israeli television after the Yedid Association for Community Empowerment wrote an official letter of complaint:

“There are a lot of weight-challenged individuals in Israel who are treated in an irreverent and hurtful manner. There is no justification to illustrate a stigma which suggests a larger woman is either pregnant or simply too fat for anyone to consider going out with.”

I do not love the term “weight-challenged” but let me just say big ups to the Yedid Association for Community Empowerment for doing their part to have some basic human decency since Julia Louis-Dreyfus couldn’t seem to scrape any together.

I just try to remember that each of these things is another opportunity for tiny acts of revolution and an opportunity for more people to realize how far we’ve gone down a very, very bad road.

Like the blog?  Here’s more of my stuff:

The Book:  Fat:  The Owner’s Manual  The E-Book is Name Your Own Price! Click here for details

The Dance Class DVDs:  Buy the Dance Class DVDs for Every Body Dance Now! Click here for the details

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I do size acceptance activism full time.  I created a membership program so that people who read the blog and feel they get value out of it and want to support the work I do can become members for ten bucks a month  To make that even cooler, I’ve now added a component called “DancesWithFat Deals” which are special deals to my members from size positive merchants. Once you are a member I send out an e-mail once a month with the various deals and how to redeem them – your contact info always stays completely private.

54 thoughts on “Not Tiny, Not Working On It, and Not Putting Up With This

  1. The Prudie video was pulled after a barrage of complaints. DP herself apologised for the inappropriateness of portraying a little girl as, literally, a gluttonous pig. Sadly her apology ended there. A start, but nowhere near good enough.

    1. No. No it wasn’t. I just finished watching the whole damnable thing and reading some of the more than 400 comments. Also, Prudie did not make an apology, the editors did so on her behalf saying that it was a “satire gone wrong.” They did NOT apologize in any way for the hurtful content or for the HORRENDOUS advice.

      I don’t have the sanity points left to put together a coherent response to slate, so I hope others have.

  2. I do not usually participate in political activism. I sign the petition or donate to the cause but I’m not good at reaching out otherwise, but somehow this really hit a nerve with me.
    This is the email I sent the center.

    You claim that your practitioners “are hand selected because of their training and ability, as well as their extensive experience and an innate gift as healers” However, the Innate gift they have appears to exclude people over a certain weight

    It’s very disappointing that you participate in fat shaming

    Do you also exculde people because of their handicap, race or sexual orientation or do you limit your prejudice to fat people.

    Please take the time to think about your prejudices and reconsider your beliefs. All people deserve to be treated with the same dignity and respect

  3. I subscribe to Prudie’s feed & was likewise horrified not only by the video caricature, but Prudie’s long-distance remote diagnoses of the health problems this child may or may not face… (What i wanted to do, if I’d have had the time, was Google stats on thin or “normal” weight individuals who suffer from “broken down joints, a failing pancreas and clogged arteries” to demonstrate that all ill health is not attributable to deathfatz)

    Mary Tyler Moore => Type I diabetes (aka “failing pancreas”), anyone?

    Great takedown, Ragen!

    1. Ah, but MTM has Type I which is a tragedy and no fault of the person who has it. Only Type II indicates gluttony and lack of self-control and a habit of kicking winsome puppies. Didn’t you know that?

      Clearly someone around here failed Science.


      1. hmmmmm, I’ve got type 2 and from what the doctors and I have discussed is that my yo-yo dieting in the 70’s, 80’s and 90’s likely tormented my poor pancreas into ill health…. not to mention the confusion that my liver deals with, it regularly dumps glucose into my blood stream if I don’t eat… yep, my blood sugars are higher before meals than after….

        I think it is more likely that it wasn’t the gluttony and lack of self control so much as the abuse those of us who are fat have put our bodies through as we attempted to ‘fit in’, conform or win acceptance and love by getting thin.

        But then, I’m just one voice.

  4. VIVA LA REVOLUTION!! When you said tiny acts of revolution that is what popped in my head! Thanks for another great post. I’m going to contact those companies RIGHT NOW!!

  5. I rely on the posts here for my daily dose of SANITY. Thank you for doing this blog. And for encouraging all of us to speak up as we can.

  6. Actually, there are plenty of indications that the original letter from the ‘concerned friend’ was a fake & that there never was an experience with a little girl eating a lot. The person referred to things such as a ’20 nugget meal’ but there IS no ’20 nugget meal’, you can get 20 nuggets but there is no meal deal with that many (my daughter-in-law is a McDonald’s manager) then there was the reference to the kid having a kids’ meal, which was described as being ‘enough food to feed two adults.’ I have seen many fast food meals from the kids’ menu & the only ‘two adults’ one of those would feed is two adult mice.

    The whole mess was a disgusting attitude in fat hatred & it is inexcusable, but I seriously believe that the little girl was made up by a troll anxious to broadcast fat hat. But no real child should ever be made the object of this kind of hatred & ridicule…indeed, none of us should.

    1. No, I think the letter was real, but the OP put it all in the worst possible terms to make the kid look bad. By calling it a meal I imagine she meant that they ordered fries and a drink to go with it, not that McDonald’s sells it that way.

      I think you’re right about the fat hatred, but I don’t think it was made up, just exaggerated.

  7. Oh, that Dear Prudence lady… this is the same one who advised a letter writer to disparage her friend who had been raped, simply because the friend had been drunk when she was raped. I am not incredibly surprised that her attitude to fat people is similarly bigoted.

    1. Wow, talk about maintaining the status quo! Is “Dear Prudence” actually a thin, white, Christian male? Because I don’t know what the hell has to be wrong with you as a woman to think reinforcing rape culture and fat shaming stigma is your ticket to success.

      1. Uh…what exactly is it about “thin, white, Christian males” that makes them automatic supporters of rape culture and fat stigma? I’m a fat, white, Christian female, and I’m not clear on why you’re stereotyping my friends and family. If we’re not going to stereotype, then let’s not stereotype anyone…

        1. Absolutely nothing makes them automatic supporters of, well, anything really. I’m a fat, white, Christian female too (though I haven’t openly identified as Christian for a long time, but that’s another story), and there’s nothing wrong with fat or white or Christian. What I was trying to touch on was that white, thin, Christian and male are the “defaults” in the US, i.e. the positions of highest privilege. What I was suggesting is that logically only someone who comes from a position of such privilege and power could openly support rape culture, fat-shaming and all the other stigmas that maintain the status quo since these are the stigmas that maintain power for the thin/white/male/etc.

          Obviously that’s not true, bigots and idiots come in all shapes, sizes, creeds and colors, but I’m trying to apply logic where clearly there’s a dearth. Anyhow, I hope I didn’t offend you and I apologize if I did. It was not my intention.

  8. In regards to the first part, I am a massage therapist and our equipment is made to accommodate fat and thin people,people of all body size as a matter of fact.I can only conclude they make the tables from scratch with glue and cardboard because I have NEVER heard of such B.S. .

  9. Sorry, I meant fat hate, not fat hat. And I do stand by what I said about the kids’ meal, they are very small portions, not usually enough to satisfy many children of any size over the age of 5 & 6. I also meant ‘disgusting EXERCISE in fat hate.’ And apparently, Prudence is a woman who weighs 125 pounds, but believes herself to be ‘disgustingly fat.’, so, no, she is not one to whom one should look for sanity, balance, or common sense. I personally want nothing to do with anyone writing an advice column, since I seriously doubt that any perfect stranger is qualified to tell me how to live my life.

    1. I have a good friend with very thin boys, and the decreased portion sizes on the school lunches this year has them complaining about being hungry or needing to buy two to get full.

  10. This was a red letter week for fat hate coming from places I had previously felt pretty OK about.
    I read Dear Prudence pretty regularly, and she has a mixed track record on issues of weight. Sometimes she has told consenting adults who wanted to ‘intervene’ with a loved one or mate to back the heck off and it was none of their business. Other times, she has not been so clear. I think this is another egregious example of “won’t someone PLEASE think of the poor innocent obese cheeldren”.
    Mostly the comments on that site are silly, but not mean.
    In this case, the whole thing was a huge exercise in ARGH.

    I get up at 5:30 to swim at least 4-5 days a week. On my way there, NPR ran a hideous story about workplace incentives to lose weight. I won’t dignify it with a link, but some were ‘positive’ monetary incentives. They also had a guy who joined some online thingie where if you didn’t meet your weight loss ‘needs’ you would auto donate to a charity you abhor. He was excited about playing Rocky instead of giving Rambo$ to the NRA. Grrr. Talk about trying to hate yourself healthy!
    The upshot of the story was that workplaces and insurers should be really ‘progressive’ and give fatties a chance to check in and show how they were exercising and MAYBE they wouldn’t penalize their rates.
    JUST what I needed to hear at ohdarkthirty on the way to the pool.
    I will say I finished in record time with extra cardio that day.

    ICK. Another vote for safe spaces, and thanks for them!

  11. Prudence made me throw up a bit. I kept wondering if the girl in question had an issue that was being overlooked if she was as hungry as she seemed. Of course, it is possible no one will check that out because she is “so fat” and is “obviously choosing” to eat and eat…BS. I’m probably not allowed to find DP and kick her am I?

    As far as the ridiculousness of the massage place…. I have been a therapist for over a decade and am over 300lbs. I have climbed on top of tables with a client, easily getting over 40bs on the table with out incident. Some of these tables were in learning spaces and they had seen a great deal of use. Most decent tables are rated for a minimum of 400lbs, but will generally accept more. Even the cheap tables from Costco are rated around 300lbs. Those people are so blatantly being sizest that it makes me so angry. I will definitely be contacting them.

    1. In a 5-second Google search, I found a table rated to a full ton for less than $150. If they can’t afford that, then they need to get the hell outta the business because they clearly have no idea how to turn a profit.

    2. You make a great point– though it’s rare, there actually is a condition where your stomach doesn’t communicate with your brain that you’re full, which can be extremely dangerous since you constantly feel hungry and will eat more than your stomach can handle if not monitored. I’m not saying that’s what’s happening, but I know there are also similar, but less extreme, conditions that might also lead this poor child to feel like she’s never sated. It’s like everyone just assumes it’s gluttony because it’s so much easier to judge someone and feel superior than to be empathic and consider that there might actually be something wrong that’s not OMGDEATHFATZ.

      1. maybe she just ikes chicken nuggets… seriously. Sometimes I feel like our surprise and horror at portion sizes is very much like the fat hate reactions out there. Sometimes you just want to keep enjoying the food. Granted, children are likely not thinking about the nutritional impact, just acting on taste and pleasure, but who knows? I know the current mentality is for fast food places to downsize portions and ‘make it more difficult’ for gluttons (I mean customers) to excess. But ultimately, someone else’s food choices are not my underpants… see Regan, I’m learning.

        And yes, I’ve seen and purchased the 20 nugget box. It is usually offered around Super Bowl time as a menu item promoted for group snacking.

      2. About that condition where your brain doesn’t understand that you can’t eat anymore. I read a post about it on Sandy’s blog (Junk Food Science) and there’s only 12 recorded cases on Earth today. So 12/7 billion = 0%. Whoopee deal.

        They had a CSI ep. about this about 10 yrs ago, where some poor guy entered a hot dog eating competition, and after it was over he was looking for more, and there was none. He died from the large quantity of hotdogs and the other stuff at a restaurant he found. Sad story, but it shows that our culture loves to watch in gory detail all those “abnormal” people and pass judgement.

        1. I don’t know anything about the Junk Food Science blog, but I’m assuming you are referring to Prader-Willi Syndrome. The PWSA website says it affects 1 in 15,000. An old friend’s daughter has the syndrome and she’s part of pretty active support group, so while it’s rare… it’s not *that* rare.

  12. Sorry, but what the fucking fuck? They must have been using the wimpy ass brand of tables. I weigh almost 50 pounds more than her, and I’ve never broken a massage table. Fortunately I have also never been denied a massage or told that the tables wouldn’t hold my weight.
    The ass clownery never fails to astound and disgust.

  13. As for Prudie, not to put too fine a point on it, I can think of no comment more appropriate than “I fart in your general direction.” She is a smarmy, sanctimonious asshat and does not deserve better.

    1. “As for Prudie, not to put too fine a point on it, I can think of no comment more appropriate than “I fart in your general direction.””

      Not even: “I wave my private parts at your auntie?”

  14. ((((fluffy hugs)))) Thank you Ragen.

    Copy of my letter to Slate:

    To Whom It May Concern,

    Slate’s and Prudence’s little cartoon video (and the concern troll
    whose letter inspired it) triggered dreadful memories for me, of
    being a “chubby” child and adolescent whose mother routinely screamed at, and threatened her with “looking just like (insert fat elderly relative’s name here)”, called her lazy, called her a hausfrau, I
    could go on but why bother?

    Knowing that I have identified myself as fat, many readers (possibly
    you among them) will assume that you know exactly what health problems I have and will have (you would be incorrect), what my activity level is (you’d be incorrect), what and how much I eat at or in between
    every meal (you would be incorrect), and how much my medical care is
    going to “cost” you (you would be incorrect).

    I could point you toward the multiple studies, encompassing thousands
    of participants over multiple years, which bear out that diets do not
    work in the long term, or other similarly comprehensive studies, done
    without profit motive, which indicate that habits are a much better
    predictor of long-term health than either body size or BMI.

    However, I’m not going to bother. You have the same access to
    Google that I do, probably better. Do you know why I’m not going to
    waste my time? Because you are not entitled to anything from me.
    Neither I, nor any other fat person you ever meet (including the poor
    fat man or woman who next occupies your adjoining airplane seat) owe
    you anything. No apologies. No explanations. No
    “exculpatory evidence”. I can assure you, I don’t go around
    demanding people explain to me why they are thin, tall, short, bald,
    hirsute or fat, because physical characteristics (including being fat)
    are just that.

    If you think you know anything about a fat girl by looking at her,
    other than that she is fat, guess what? You are a bigot. Chew on
    that, bigot.

    What you are entitled to do when you see a fat person, is mind your
    own god. damned. business.

    I’m sorry Prudence thinks telling her readers that someone should MYOB is a bad idea. Dear Abby and Ann Landers both did that for decades and millions of people loved them. I don’t hate Prudence, but I do find her sort of pitiful.

    I want that horrible video gone, but if thousands of complaints
    haven’t moved you by now, my two cents won’t either.

    Leave us the fuck alone,

    Dyanna Flynn

  15. I weight over 300 lbs. I graduated from massage school. The only thing you have to take into consideration when massaging someone is their actual body SHAPE, not their weight or size – you need to know how to support and align them. We were also taught that although adipose tissue may be more susceptible to bruising, being fat is not contraindicated for massage. So that healing center in Colorado is full of shit, and if they aren’t FOS and weight biased then they are cheap as hell because any *quality* portable massage table is going to have a working weight of 600-800 pounds! If a fat person needs a massage, you grab your extra bolstering pillows and you give them a damn massage. NHC is a disgrace to the industry.

  16. To whom it may concern ,
    I don’t know if you and the writer of dear Prudence really know the repercussions of what you did not only with the pig faced girl Feb 20th, 2013(which was disgusting) but also her suggestion that a rape victim should be shamed Jan 30th,2012 ( Oh my god why? ) . Her advice on these occasions ( I will admit I am not a regular reader ) could be highly damaging , first off I volunteered quite often at a gender resource center and the slogan was anything other than an 18 or older , sober , and enthusiastic yes is a no . Some of your readers could be victims of date rape , which in some cases is easier to point the finger at the victim and tell them oh well you got yourself involved in that its your fault. It is never the victim’s fault even if they are drunk ,and falling down (which in this case I feel makes them more vulnerable to predators ) . Saying that she is trying to ruin his life is to me essentially telling people who have been the victim of such abuse that is is not okay for them to report it . Its a possibility that the friend might have been reaching out to her friend at first , changing the story out of shame to in her mind gain more control of the situation . The friend should be supportive and maybe try to get the girl into some counselling , not blaming her, or shaming her into it but actually reaching out and helping her . OK now for the original reason I am writing to you , the fat shaming . I am here to tell you I have had enough shaming from the news , from friends , from relatives , from random strangers and to do that to a six year old girl is just shameful. A quick Google search pulls up this so called advice column with pig faced girl ,and it seriously makes me angry that you just hid it away on your page. The apology if you can call it that is disgraceful , you don’t apologize for the content of the advice but for offending people (which is just a cop out ) . Its like its completely okay what she said ,but “I am sorry that you are such a sensitive wussy” . People are fat for a variety of reasons, and let me tell you eat less exercise more doesn’t work . Its a lie , and food is not the enemy . The woman saw the child eat on two occasions , while out and about at restaurants , which is not evidence of how the child is eating at home . By going to the pediatrician that woman could be causing life long damage to that girl , who isn’t food policed by her parents . She could make her have lasting issues with food , this is how disordered eating starts . It could also cause metabolic problems , what people also don’t realize is a fat kid doesn’t equal fat adult . I have a co work who eats a lot to and she is tiny , thin doesn’t equal health. Health is a multidimensional thing , and once people accept that the world will be a better place. I still have eating issues because of shame I suffered as a ( thin) child , and have heard horror stories from others who suffered at the hands of “well meaning adults” , Prudence should have been more prudent and told the food policing friend to mind her own business. Not do it more on a bigger scale just do it anonymously.
    Sent 🙂

  17. So, call the pediatrician, and what will she say once the doc gets on the phone? “Uh, doctor, I know that Little Girl Here is a patient of yours, and I’m concerned about her eating habits. I’ve seen her eat two meals, and one time she ate 20 chicken nuggets in one sitting. Don’t you think she’s going to die now?” She will sound like a total tool.

    And then, WTF is the pediatrician going to say? Legally, s/he is not even allowed to confirm that said child is a patient of his. The doctor will probably say something like, “I don’t discuss patient care with anyone except the patient and his/her parents/legal guardians.”

    Clearly this Prudence woman (of whom I have never heard up until today, praise the Lord), and Sergeant Chicken Nuggets don’t even have any idea of how the world actually functions.

    Get a life, people.

    PS: Have we considered that maybe the girl was going through a growth spurt? Kids eat a TON when they’re growing. Maybe she hadn’t had breakfast, and so was quite hungry by lunchtime? Plus, normal, perfectly healthy children go through weird food stages where they refuse to eat anything *except*, say, chicken nuggets. In which case, I guess you give them chicken nuggets and Flintstone vitamins until they grow out of it. When my sister was little, she basically lived on crackers and cucumbers for an entire year. There are worse things to eat, I suppose, but it’s still rather lacking in the uh…nutritional diversity standings. She even sang songs about it: ♪ “Cucumbers on my he-ad” ♫ Kids are weird. Especially little kids. Leave them alone, lady.

  18. It just never stops. I have a Facebook friend who posted a picture from Team Bachbody yesterday. It is a thin silhouette on the left, filled with pictures of fruits and vegetables. Then a fat silhouette on the right filled with cookies, cake, ice cream and other junk. The caption read, “Your body, your choice.” Of course I couldn’t help myself. I had to post citations from MULTIPLE studies that refuted that ridiculous post. I may have given up on the majority of people being anything but assholes.

      1. Thanks! I am just so sick of it. I am pissed! A few weeks ago I was at a women’s meeting at my church. I was eating apples and grapes, having just finished my workout. Two thin women at my table got into a discussion about dieting. Of course, my fat (yet HEALTHY) ass is sitting there eating fruit. These two women, with chicken biscuits and donuts on their plate, went on to pontificate about how it’s really just simple math – you take in fewer calories than you expend and you will lose weight. Of course they were careful not to say any of this to me, just each other. Then one of the ladies went on to shame the other by telling her how many calories were in her chicken mini and donut and she should choose to eat one or the other instead of both. I was SO triggered – since I spent most of my college years ruining my metabolism and spirit by having multiple eating disorders and buying into all this bullshit. Now I sit here knowing my habits are healthy yet my body is large, and I just pity these bitches. But at the same time I am pissed that they would openly say al that crap while I am sitting right there. I allowed them to trigger my negative self talk with their utter stupidity for a few hours that day – then I came home and read entries on this blog! Just like I do when family members trigger me EVERY freaking holiday and get together. Just like television and radio does every five minutes. This appearance obsessed society is the problem. NOT MY WEIGHT! People can suck it. I know who I am and how I live.

        1. You’re absolutely right. I also spent my college years–and my high school years–and my junior high years–and most of my adult life (up to age 45) wrecking my metabolism with bulimia and yo-yo dieting.

  19. I’m a licensed massage therapist in NC and I’m also a fat woman. I purposely bought a table with a load bearing weight of 500 lbs. What that means in massage speak is the weight of the client combined with the pressure I use to perform a stroke. I’ve had people on my table in excess of 300 lbs and the table doesn’t even groan let alone break. If this woman has a table that broke with a person weighing less than 200 lbs then she needs new tables. I suspect she’s just a fat bigot. People who carry more weight have so much to gain (no pun intended) from massage. I’m sorry that the woman in Colrado had such an awful experience. If she ever gets to Raleigh, NC she has a free massage from me anytime.

  20. The top rated tables at Amazon, all around $65-$80 (and appearing to be on the low end of the cost scale for massage tables) supported 450 pounds or more. A $130 table holds 2,000 pounds.

    I thought Ragen was joking when she mocked the Natural Healing Center for buying their tables at the 99 cent store, but it appears they must be doing exactly that, because it looks outright difficult to even find a massage table that supports less than 450 pounds.

  21. I am filled with loathing for Dear Prudence. I went and watched the video. Which now has a disclaimer saying that the horrible pig girl is a satire and they mean no offense, while the horrible pig girl is frozen on the video. It was hateful and offensive.

    Also, I hope that any pediatrician in this day of HIPPA laws knows better than to accept anonymous reports from a “caring adult.”

    I want Prudence removed from the internet. Can we start a petition?!

    1. A petition gets my full respect for civilized diplomacy, but in this case it would almost certainly encourage that bitch to keep playing War Against Fatties, only to bask in the warm, glowing LED evidence of her petty little power. I’m sorry, ladies, but that’s not how a bitch like me goes to war. (Bitches, can I get an amen?) This is not a goddamn game of Halo we’re talking about! (Not at you, Susie.)

      My solution is far less legal and sane than yours, but infinitely superior in efficiency and karmic justice. Unlike the tens (maybe hundreds) of thousands of people needed to get a petition off the ground – which, by the way, can concurrently prove to certain sponsors how “famous” she is – it wouldn’t take but half a dozen sincerely terrifying bitches to drag her skinny ass into the nearest bathroom for a little ‘Fight Club’ reenactment.

      I don’t want to have to go to war (sociologically or otherwise) every time someone gets a self-righteous bee up their ass about me and mine, so I feel not only justified but OBLIGATED to ensure that the thought of my fat ass on a warpath promises no fun or satisfaction to ANYBODY involved.

      *cue dramatic exit music: “Uprising” by Muse*

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